What Should Online Professionals Do When Someone Ticks Them Off?

By Dana Prince

For every action there is a reaction and your reactions will impact your professional life. One of the benefits of working from home is the lack of dealing with a huge amount of office politics. But, (sadly) this doesn’t mean you’ll never have to deal with people acting like idiots in your work life again.

I’ve had to deal with writers working for me that have upset me, clients that have annoyed me, and writing friends/ acquaintances that have done things that have ruffled my feathers. Such is life when you deal with various personality types. Just as with my former cubicle colony, there is a certain online code of conduct that should be followed in order to preserve professionalism and protect the business you operate online. An online war is almost NEVER the answer as it can cause some real damage. My advice:

Think carefully before you react….No matter how mad or how right you are.

Here’s what I do when I’m upset at something either in my writing business or related to writing or marketing communities I frequent:

Wait!

Try not to react instantly. One of the great things about working from home is that you have an opportunity to censor yourself. You don’t have to let people see your knee jerk reactions. If you do, it can be hard (or impossible) to undo because you’ve probably reacted in writing and others have seen and / or saved that reaction. It can make you look unprofessional and haunt you repeatedly. Take the time to carefully think about your response. Walk away. Take a breather first.

Not so hasty with that reply….

Carefully read your reply before you send it. Consider letting it rest for a bit and then re-read it once you’ve simmered a little.

Tone

Remember that things can come across the wrong way in writing. It can be difficult to communicate and to read tone electronically and most of us can recall at least one scenario where we’ve misunderstood someone in email. Writers tend to pull off tone a bit more accurately than the average person because it’s our job to be able to come across with adequate emotion but there’s always room for interpretation so before you react, stop and ask whether or not you’re reading things the way they’re intended. The web encourages lazy communication and things do get lost in translation. This applies to notes from clients, from people working for you, or other things that are in writing.

What’s Next?

Make an educated guess of what could happen next and decide what you would like to happen. Do you want to clarify your position or defend yourself? Do you want to exact revenge (not usually worth it!)? Or, do you want to simply sever ties, move on, and forget someone exists? Before you respond in anger to someone online, ask yourself if the response you’re ready to shoot back will help you get the reaction / result you’re hoping for. Is it worth it?

Sanity Check (Or the benefit of a moan to a friend)

Bounce the scenario off a trusted friend. Nothing wrong with a sanity check! And, getting the story off your chest could be just the thing to help you simmer down and think clearly before acting.

After you’ve had a chance to think carefully about how to respond and you’ve carefully analyzed your response, go ahead and react. If any time has passed you’re either going to be more calm or you’re going to be more determined to make your own point but in either case you’ll have a chance to get your desired reaction because you’ll have the opportunity to articulate yourself for the best outcome possible. How many times have you reacted quickly and then thought, “I wish I’d have said ____________”.

I say, take time to carefully weigh your online reactions, no matter how upset you are or how out of line the other party is, and you won’t likely have to regret how you’ve handled difficult situations.